YOU ARE THE REASON FOR UNHAPPY
Are you addicted to
happiness
Happiness is not a one-pill
drug we’ve been told. We can search for it forever, and then realise, when it’s
too late, that the answer always lay within us. But what if I said the answer
to your unhappiness also lay within you. That unhappiness is not difficult to
get rid of. All you have to do is get rid of your “unhappiness addiction”.
WHAT IS UNHAPPINESS ADDICTION?
Just ask yourself this. Every time you are happy, are you also afraid? Before you have regaled in your happiness do you feel almost guilty, and pull yourself back to that familiar feeling of dread and guilt that you’ve cocooned yourself in for far too long? That masochistic feeling that even if you laugh out loud for a few minutes you are actually preparing yourself for the next bad thing that comes your way.
Psychology says that people who appear addicted to unhappiness
tend to find reasons to be miserable when life gets “too good”, prefer to take
the victim role, and compete with others to see who has it the hardest. He
says, “There are several scientific studies indicating that many people have a
feeling of being undeserving of happiness.”
FATALISTIC ATTITUDE
unhappiness is a luxury, and some people are addicted to it. These people have wired themselves to be unhappy because it’s the only way they can perform.”
FATALISTIC ATTITUDE
unhappiness is a luxury, and some people are addicted to it. These people have wired themselves to be unhappy because it’s the only way they can perform.”
Suffering on an everyday
basis is a way of living for some people as they subconsciously believe that by
taking the hard road and looking at things pessimistically, they are going to
produce better results. It’s like bargaining with Greater Powers so that
someone up there sees your pain, and then gives you something to laugh about.
INDIAN MENTALITY
INDIAN MENTALITY
"Especially in India, we have this traditional belief ingrained by our parents and elders that if you laugh too much, you will have to cry a lot too. And soon. This subconscious feeling makes us more unhappy.”Most of us do not have the resilience genes in place because of this attitude of discontentment. people are less unhappy when they are more resilient and have better coping strategies. They have ‘trained’ themselves to being happy. They don’t stay in the victim mode for more than 1 minutes max.”
BEING A VICTIM
Whether good or bad, deal with the situation and move on
to the next moment. Don’t get into the habit of postponing your happiness. I will be happy after the promotion, after the proposal, after the admission. but what
about the here and now? A simple breakfast can be happiness.
even the smallest thing, like a water bottle dropping from your hand can make you unhappy, if you feel you are never in control of things. “It’s far easier to fall into the unhappiness trap, and brood than to get up and change the habit.”
Unhappiness also becomes an addiction because people are caught up in their drama stories. We all repeat our actions again and again because invariably, people don’t want to change. The habitual cribbing is our safe zone. And it’s dangerous. At these moments, every time we are saying we’ve failed, our minds are being hardwired to believe we will fail again.”
even the smallest thing, like a water bottle dropping from your hand can make you unhappy, if you feel you are never in control of things. “It’s far easier to fall into the unhappiness trap, and brood than to get up and change the habit.”
Unhappiness also becomes an addiction because people are caught up in their drama stories. We all repeat our actions again and again because invariably, people don’t want to change. The habitual cribbing is our safe zone. And it’s dangerous. At these moments, every time we are saying we’ve failed, our minds are being hardwired to believe we will fail again.”
Why Does Growth Mindset Matter?
If we have a “growth mindset,” we enjoy challenges, despite the risk, usually because we value learning and growth more than others thinking we know what we’re doing. And because we’re always trying new things, we often don’t know what we’re doing. Still, those of us with a growth mindset often build new skills more easily because we believe we can and so we really work at it.
Signs
that say you make yourself unhappy...
- You repeat unpleasant episodes and wallow in your stories of unfairness that happened in the past.
- You resist what’s happening now.
- You give too much power to your ego.
- Complain about everything.
- Avoid and procrastinate dealing with problems.
- Worry about things that have not happened yet.
- Overwhelmed by uncertainty.
- Judge yourself in a harsh way.
- I Feel enslaved to your emotions and powerless to change.
- Feel dissatisfied even when life is going well.
- Struggle to celebrate your goals
- You have a hard time putting things behind you.
- Dissatisfaction is your second nature
- Fix the offending issue at hand
- Understand the source of negativity
- Identify baby steps to address them. Proactively dealing with your problems now rather than avoiding them will help you regain your happiness
-Hold tightly to your
self-care programme
-Turn setbacks into
victories
-Have effective ways to
get control over painful moods – good music, workout or travel.
